for evidence of male fragility look no further than their basically universal fear of dating women taller than them
why he lick me
THIS IS SUPER COOL THOUGH IF YOU UNDERSTAND HORSES. LIKE THAT NIPPING IS A GROOMING BEHAVIOR HORSE’S DO TO BOND AND TO MAINTAIN AND IMPROVE SOCIAL BONDS. SO THAT HORSE IS BASICALLY TREATING THE CAT AS PART OF THE HERD AND SUSTAINING THE FRIENDLY BOND.
IT IS SAYING, “this tiny horse is very tiny but we are friends. Look at my tiny friend.”
Horses and cats get along really well actually! Cats in barns scare away all the rats and mice that frighten the horses. SO it’s less like the horse accepting it into the ‘herd’ as the horse saying ‘thank you, brave warrior, for protecting me from the scary chitter beasts.’
he didn’t even say goodbye, he didn’t take the time to lie
Kill the idea that naivety is an unforgivable flaw but cynicism is just wisdom, murder it, chop it up and serve it for dinner, I don’t care, just end this bullshit idea that it’s better to hate than to love and better to rot in miserable bitter resignation than to hope for the best.
BROKEN BOY SOLDIER (A WINTER SOLDIER MIX)
broken boy soldier the raconteurs | i’ve been waiting for you costanza | d.a.t.p nephew | help i’m alive metric | bullet with butterfly wings frida snell | iron woodkid | castle of glass linkin park | shoot your gun 22-20s | feeling good nina simone
So this is dedicated to grimmsical/dewritten who loves Sebastian Stan and Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier and all the sad crying things about him. As you can see, it’s kinda messy and I gave up on trying to make it pretty. Learned a shit ton about layer masking and how to make metallic fonts though.
I chose the songs for the lyrics first and then the atmosphere. This is primarily MCU!Bucky but also incorporating some 616!Bucky because I find that version more interesting (sorry).
"What the hell,” Bucky says, delighted. ”I knew you didn’t wear underwear under this thing!”
Steve scowls, spits a strand of hair out of his mouth. “You need a damn hair cut,” he says.
Sam glances at Natasha, gun still trained on the evil scientist holding a smoldering cannon and ruining the menacing effect by looking completely stunned.
"Body swap?" he asks warily.
Natasha sighs and aims a flying kick at the evil scientist’s head.
“Body swap,” she confirms.
"Look, all I’m saying is you can use your powers for a little evil,” Bucky argues, propping his feet on Sam’s dining table.
Sam tries not to focus on how weird it is to see Steve’s body tipping backward in a chair, eating a box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch with his hands.
Steve ignores Bucky in favor of plaiting his hair back.
Sam also tries not to focus on how weird it is to see Bucky’s face visibly contemplating the finer points of fishtail over French.
"Wouldn’t going rogue kinda ruin his cred as a superhero?" Sam asks, stealing a handful of cereal. Bucky slaps his wrist, which is—a lot less painful than it usually is, considering his hand’s not metal this time.
"I’m not talking about stealing or taking over the world or anything," Bucky says. "But if I was Captain America, I’d—”
His eyes light up. Steve stops braiding, eyes narrowing.
"Bucky," he begins, warning evident in his tone.
"See you losers later!" Bucky crows, then with a quick feint left and a dash right, he’s evading Steve’s grasping hands and bursting through the back door.
Literally bursting through. The door gives a mournful creak before it falls off its hinges, slamming to the ground with a crash.
Sam thinks wistfully of life before making friends with two giants who have no concept for 21st century property damage.
So. The situation is handled now, buuuuut you MIGHT get a couple messages about Captain America streaking on the National Mall. Just heads up. FYI. Natasha texts.
When Steve watches the footage on TV later, he’s got a weirdly pleased expression on his face.
"Is that really what I look like from the back?" he asks.
Sam figures all the Captain Booty jokes have finally clicked.
"Okay, but how are you going to get James back?" Natasha asks, filing her pinkie nail into a sharp point.
Bucky snorts. “He’s not,” he says idly, taking a selfie with the phone he stole from Tony Stark last time they were in New York. He’s been doing that a lot lately. Sam has the sneaking suspicion that Bucky’s just sending all the pictures to his own damn self for later perusal.
Steve frowns. “It would be a pretty big violation, using his body to do something he didn’t want. Especially after all he’s been through.”
Bucky’s face goes soft. And since it’s actually Steve’s face, it genuinely looks soft, not just darkly handsome and sort of wounded and a little murder-y.
"That’s nice, Steve, thanks—" he says, and that’s when all their phones chime with a text message picture of giant pectorals with little Captain America shields drawn around the nipples.
Natasha grins. “I like the little stars,” she says.
Steve comes in the next day wearing head to toe Yankees gear.
The newspaper headline that day reads: Captain America nearly brains unsuspecting Yankees fan. Does Cap hate baseball?!
They end up switching back into their bodies at the precise moment when Steve is about to punch a robot full force with his metal arm and Bucky’s doing some complicated parkour off a building about twenty stories up.
Needless to say, it could go better.